“Aww…” The Cutest Pests You’d Want to Pet

You may not want to believe it but there are cuties your pest control service has to deal with. These are, however, not the roaches you grew to loathe, or the flies your blood often boiled for. These are the most unusual of pests you’ve heard of, maybe even truly considered to be pets. Intrigued, I guess? Then let’s start:

Pigeons

 

Cuteness: 6/10

Peskiness: 8/10

 

Are you willing to accept that the beautiful dove, the symbol of peace, and your wedding’s guest of honor is a pest? Well, at least its cousin is: the feral pigeon—also known as “rats with wings”. It’s not that they’re awfully nasty as rats are, just that they’re too generous that they leave their droppings everywhere. And since they’re urban dwellers, they’re usually a problem of the city, especially since their dried milky bowel releases can cause the snuffles in the form of Chiamdiosis, a disease similar to influenza, and a bit of the cough through Psittacosis, a disease like pneumonia. If you still want to pet them, don’t be sad. These are curable diseases. Don’t let them stop you from petting the cuter versions of eagles that you can train to fly your letters everywhere.

Moles

Cuteness: 7/10

Peskiness: 7/10

 

Yes, Diglett’s kind. These gentle critters don’t mean it, but they ruin beautiful gardens, lawns, turfs, and sports grounds in their constant digging. They only really hunt for insects as food, that’s all, but folks see them as a mean and menacing Dugtrio, off to wreak havoc. They’re especially good with popping tiny hills, exposing rocks and debris, damaging plant roots, and especially digging. Did you know they can dig up to 4 meters per hour? Wow! They’re not just cute little creatures, they’re also quite fast and strong. Think of making an ant farm the size of a swimming pool, and then adding a mole in it. It’s a whole new zoo!

Chipmunk

 

Cuteness: 8/10

Peskiness: 6/10

 

No matter how cute Alvin and the gang are, they are pests in your garden. But why, oh why? They’re furry little critters that quietly munch on their nuts—and sing! Cute and talented, now that’s more of a treat than a nuisance, right? It’s not their fault they have to eat, too. And besides, they don’t know they enter your yards and homes without permission. They’re just really trying to be friends with you, so much that they even try to reach out to your pets. That’s what it means when they steal the grains you give your birds or the food from your pets’ dishes. And you know that their friendliness is just aflame when they invite their families and friends over, and have a hard party underneath your patio—so hard they end up rocking the foundations just a teeny bit. Oh Alvin…

Rabbits

 

Cuteness: 10/10

Peskiness: 7/10

 

Those little bubbles of sheer cuteness and gentleness are pests? Well how about that, the world has officially gone crazy. And you know what’s next? The end of the world—outrageous! How can these balls of cuteness overload be considered vermin, pests? They’re not roaches, flies, or rats—far from them! These are health buffs that just really love eating your crops, beans, leaves, and flowers. Both of you see differently, and you can’t help it: while you think before you is a garden, they see it as a salad bowl. All they need are actual porcelain bowls, and tiny forks for their dining. Oh, and don’t forget their adorable bibs! You wouldn’t want them to spoil their clean fur now, would you? Cutesies!

Pests can be adorable too, and being cute is not a part of their act, same as being a pest is. They just need to survive like you, so please be gentle with them… As if those puppy dog eyes aren’t enough to melt your heart.